As a parent when we talk about pressure on kids, we usually think about big issues – issues like behavior, manners, studies, career, etc. But a small incident made me realize that sometimes our routine instructions (small things that we nag them about) can also pressurize our child.
4 years old (while getting ready for the school; BTW we started sending him by school bus): Mom I want to take a chocolate to school.
I: No, its bad for your teeth.
He: Mom!! Please!! Please..Please..Please (he folds his hands dramatically making a sweet face)
I give in..I hand him a Munch (prefer it as its not pure chocolate and has wafer inside)
He happily hugs me and says: Thank you Mom
Makes my entire day.
10 minutes later, I see he has unwrapped chocolate (he has thrown away the wrapper) in his hands.
I: Hey..you are spoiling your hands, it will melt in your hands and you will spoil your clothes.
I give him irritated look. “Eat it..finish it off now”.
He: No!! I want to share it with my friend in the school bus. You told me to share with your friends.
I: So why did you unwrap it? You could have done it in the bus.
He: The driver will scold me if I throw the wrapper in the bus…and you have asked me not to litter. How could I throw it outside the bus?
I , “You could have kept the wrapper in your bag..thrown in the school dustbin.”
Stressed out he cried out, “ Then you would have said I spoiled the bag”.
Such pressure on my little one. I felt ashamed that I actually pressurized him on things like not spoiling his clothes or bag. But then, can I help it?